Sometimes you just feel like asking:
"What the f*** God?"
Currently my reasoning for this question are a lack of direction in my life (typical). Although it's not because there have been no opportunities, but it seems that they have all been getting shot down for one reason or another. Some are scheduling conflicts, but some are just unnecessary conflicts that are completely out of my control. And it makes me ask that question.
I'm not asking in an "I'm angry at God" or "I'm upset at God" but more like a bewildered wide eyed "what in the world just happened" kind of way. True, I'm a bit upset at God, probably a bit angry, I mean who doesn't get like that when things they want to see happen don't?
But I've learned far too many times that God's way is better, and that when doors open and close, its all because of him and not because of me. And I came back home clearly knowing that something was in store for me here and not back in New York. I am back clearly knowing and confident in God's plan, no questions asked.
And so I ask that question rhetorically, knowing that another closed door means more and more answers, more and more possibilities, and that with each dropped opportunity I'm getting a bit closer to the one God actually wants for me.
So while its frustrating to feel shut out and disappointed by lost opportunities, excitement builds knowing that sometime in the future God's going to bless me with some amazing opportunity.
And then I can go, "What the f*** God" because it will be that much more awesome. =)
1 comment:
mmm..
You know, it's crazy to see how God works in our lives and just the things that He puts us through. Something that I've been learning is that 'God's will for us does not always proceed in a straight line' and that we NEVER see a clear connection or answer from one point to another. We won't understand why we're in certain situations we are in now, but I think ultimately, we'll never understand His plans for us.
Romans 8:28 "We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him,, who have been called according to his purpose." Just be reminded and remember that God is continuously working in your life towards your awesome future that WILL glorify God in everything that you do.
Something I read, that lead me to respond to your post.. said..
"But he always has the big picture in mind as he handles the stories of our lives. he knows the beginning from the end, and he operates accordingly. God always has a plan, But it may not follow human logic. In fact, it may often seem to go directly against what we believe about God"
Stay strong and actively wait for God. I know He's going to use you in unimaginable ways.
i love you and love seeing you home <3
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